The Slammables Get 'S**T' From WWE2k16 Download Code (NSFW)

The Slammables Get 'S**T' From WWE2k16 Download Code (NSFW)

In mid-July, The Slammables were suspended from the WWE2k16 network for uploading "suggestive" images.

The Powers-That-Be were trying to create a wrestler who had text and images on his person blurred out or pixelated, as if the "broadcast" was trying to hide something naughty from the audience.

The uploaded pixelated and blurred-out images were actually benign images and G-rated words.

Nonetheless, The Slammables were given a 14-day rip. The Powers-That-Be accepted the suspension. 2K has to keep those busy-body mothers happy. It's understandable that they protect their product with such diligence.

That's why it was so surprising when The Slammables were given (by the game) an upload code with the word "sh*t" in it.

The Powers-That-Be were too scared to take a screen grab of the code, for fear of getting another suspension, that they took a photograph.

"We understand that 2K has a huge task of keeping everyone happy and offending no one, but apparently their users have to be more diligent about being offensive then they have to be," commented The Powers-That-Be.

Faces of Fear Named Tag Team Of the Year

Faces of Fear Named Tag Team Of the Year

A once relevant magazine has named Faces of Fear "Tag Team of the Year."

The honor is quite odd since it's August and the Faces of Fear only held the Team of Tag titles for about a month.

Faces of Fear are Black Death and Adorable Love Kitty.

"I don't know who reads magazines anymore but they got it right, Faces of Fear are the best tag team on the planet!" boasts Adorable Love Kitty.

"Blood will run in the streets. Boils will fester with black puss. The reckoning shall be recognized and the dead will stand up and eat the flesh of the living," answered Black Death after being asked what he thought of being on a cover of a magazine.

This is the first time any of The Slammables has graced the cover of a magazine. Although The Rockstar dated an issue of Redbook for two weeks and Deuce Danger ate a Popular Mechanics for breakfast.

CAW IS WAR - Episode #17 RESULTS!!!

CAW IS WAR - Episode #17 RESULTS!!!

CAW IS WAR celebrates the Olympics. Many of the night's matches had an Olympic theme. Several The Slammables wore t-shirts representing their country of origin and the Olympic rings.



Match 1
The match was supposed to be a race around the ring but Pete Townshend attacked The Mailman before it was over. The Mailman used his finishing move, the Zip Code, to triumph in the ensuing battle.

Match 2
Deuce Danger picks up a victory in his debut match. He pinned Scott Armstrong, also making his The Slammables debut, in the middle of the squared circle, 1-2-3.

Match 3
Colossus Maximus and George Washington competed in a test of strength. Their test turned into a beat down with The Roman getting gold.

Match 4
The Chest Club, Babe and Bombshell, defeated Dirty Diana and Kathy in an epic and hard fought tag team match-up.

Match 5
It began as a traditional Olympic style wrestling match but quickly devolved into a donnybrook. The Olympian got the "W" after he gave Omar Kenneth "The Spar" and pinned him in the center of the ring.

Match 6
A six-man Olympic battle royal featuring General Major (U.S.A.), Deuce Danger (Freedonia), The Rockstar (Great Britain), Big Ham (Greece), and Superstar (Nation) is won by "The Samoan" Jacob Goldman.

Deuce Danger Debuts On CAW IS WAR

Deuce Danger Debuts On CAW IS WAR

It will be a busy night on CAW IS WAR.Not only will The Slammables be honoring the Summer Olympics, currently underway in Rio, they will also be welcoming a new wrestler. Deuce Danger debuts Tuesday on CAW IS WAR.

Deuce Danger is on loan from the wrestling promotion Fresh Freedonia Wrestling. He's also a cyclops.

"Don't let my one eye fool you. I'm a championship caliber wrestler. I've not only dominated Fresh Freedonia Wrestling, but I've dominated wrestling promotions all over the world. I expect to dominate The Slammables too. Just please don't throw anything at me. I have terrible depth perception."

The last wrestlers to make their The Slammables debut have been Broddy Dubb and Omar Kenneth.
The Powers-That-Be warn that more wrestlers are coming.

"HELLO DEUCE! I'M BRAD. I'M THE RESIDENT NINJA AROUND HERE. IF YOU NEED ANY NINJAING JUST ASK ME. I'M A NINJA!" whispers Brad, The Ninja.

"Who are you? Who? Who? Who? Who?" asks Pete Townshend.

"Welcome Brudda. Mazel tov, uso. We can always use another good mentsh around here," acknowledges "The Samoan" Jacob Goldman.

CAW IS WAR is every Tuesday night on Twitch. The show begins roughly at 9pm and continues being rough.

Interview With Clark Schliebe

Interview With Clark Schliebe

Recently, TheSlammables.com sat down with current Mr. Belt holder, and the promotion's resident nerd, Clark Schleibe.

TheSlammables.com: Are you a geek or a nerd?
Clark Schliebe: Yes, but I'm not a spaz. Ha! Ha! Ha!

TheSlammables.com: How did it feel to when Mr. Belt?
Clark Schliebe: It was magnificent. It was even better then when I beat my friend at Magic: The Gathering on turn three.

TheSlammables.com: Have you ever kissed a girl?
Clark Schliebe: Ha! Ha! Ha! Girls. Does my cousin count?

TheSlammables.com: Who is your favorite superhero?
Clark Schliebe: There's an eleven-way tie for my favorite superhero between Green Lantern, Flash, Wolverine, Cyclops, Spider-Man, The Hulk, Batman, The Atom, Nightwing, Deadpool, and The Black Canary.

TheSlammables.com: Do you have any special words for your fans, for the Nerd Herd?
Clark Schliebe: Thank you for supporting me. You're the best. Dungeons and Dragons!

The interviews ends as Clark Schliebe runs away while waving his arms over his head.

Babe Boasts 'Being Best Boring'

Babe Boasts 'Being Best Boring'

Babe tells TheSlammables.com that she's the best woman wrestler in the promotion and bored with the lack of competition.

"I'm the best woman wrestler in the promotion and bored with the lack of competition," Babe told TheSlammables.com.

Babe won the The Slammables Women's Global Slampionship at Slammables Genesis. Since then she has lost just one match and that match was after she was jumped by Good Girl.

"I've lost just one match and that was after I was jumped by Good Girl."

Babe has successfully defended her title at every PPV.

"Don't get me wrong. I love being champion, but it's getting to the point where I'm barely breaking a sweat. If it doesn't get better, I may start wrestling men."

Failed contenders for her title include Good Girl, Marilyn The Monster, and The Basket Case.

"This is no joke: Babe is the best The Slammables has to offer. Want to smell my flower?" asks Fingers.

"I wouldn't mind wrestling Babe. If you know what I mean. Rock and Roll!" says The Rockstar.

"Babe is..." whispers Clark Schliebe as he looks around awkwardly and wrings his hands "...a girl."

The Slammables To Pay Tribute To Olympics

The Slammables To Pay Tribute To Olympics

The Slammables will pay tribute to the 2016 Rio Summer Olympics during the next episode of CAW IS RAW

The nature of the tribute has not been announced but we've been assured that the tribute won't include a torch.

"The Olympics is a thing and we are a thing. So it makes sense that our things should cross," explains the Powers-That-Be.

No The Slammables has ever competed in the Olympics. The Olympian is named after the town he lives in. Although he does have a gold medal.

Incidentally, seven WWE superstars have competed in the Olympics.

"I love the Olympics. My favorite sports are the equestrian events," notes The Horse Man.

"I'm more of a Winter Olympics guy," admits Avalanche.

"It's going to happen in Rio. Freedonia will win its first Olympic medal," predicted Deuce Danger.

CAW IS WAR happens Tuesday nights around 8pm on Twitch.

The Slammables Now Selling Merchandise

The Slammables Now Selling Merchandise

It may not be much now, but The Slammables website now has its own merchandising section.

Recently added, Shoppables is where fans can go to spend a bunch of money on cheap products with The Slammables logos on them.

Right now, the site is only selling The Slammables teddy bears, t-shirts, and mugs, but more products, including shirts dedicated to the wrestlers, are on their way.

“We wanted to make more money so we decided to sell crap people don’t need. I’m going to buy a Winnebago and a meat smoker with my portion of the profits,” explained the CFO of the Powers-That-Be.

You can reach The Slammables store by clicking here.

All orders will be delivered by The Mailman.

“I want a teddy bear. It’s hairy like me,” said Bearwolfe.

“Ask yourself who is benefiting from Shoppables. Ask yourself where is the money going. When you do that, you will see, like I already see, just how big this conspiracy truly is,” answered “The Real Deal” Ryan Davis after he was asked if he's been to the Shoppables page.

“I’m going to buy a mug and put alcohol in it. Rock and Roll!” exclaimed The Rockstar.

CAW IS WAR 'What If?' Special RESULTS!!!

CAW IS WAR 'What If?' Special RESULTS!!!

Taking a break from their normal The Slammables action, certain The Slammables battle their real-life virtual Wwe counterpart. All the WWE legends selected were either retired or semi-retired.

Match 1
Christian Crimson defeats Kane.

Match 2
Babe leaps from the top rope to finally put away WWE Hall of Famer Trish Stratus.

Match 3
The New Natural Disasters beat the original Natural Diasasters. Avalance pins Typhoon.

Match 4
Daniel Bryan kicks his way to victory. He pins The Oympian in the center of the ring. Yes! Yes! Yes!

Match 5
"The Real Deal" Ryan Davis kicks out of the pedigree and goes on to pin Triple HHH in the main event.

The Slammables vs. The Slammables returns next week on CAW IS WAR!

'What If?" Tonight On A Very Special CAW IS WAR

'What If?" Tonight On A Very Special CAW IS WAR

Tonight on CAW IS WAR, The Slammables will take a break from wrestling one another. Instead, they will wrestle their counterparts from the WWE Universe.

The evening is being called "What If?" and will feature matches with Triple H, Trish Stratus, and Kane, just to name three.

"Most people probably don't know, then again most people probably don't care, that many of The Slammables are patterned, modeled, or a reaction to real-life WWE superstars," explained The Slammables Powers-That-Be.

For example, The Olympian was made as a tribute to Daniel Bryan. The Olympian uses Daniel Bryan's entrance and his move set (minus his finishers).

"The beauty of The Slammables is we're not bound by time and space like other wrestling promotions. The laws of physics don't apply to us," waxed Clark Schleibe.

"If this is the best of The Slammables taking on the best of the WWE, then why am I not wrestling Roman Reigns?" asked Colossus Maximus.

"I'd like to see Big Ham take on the Big Show or Omar Kenneth battle Kevin Owens, or The Faces of Fear duel The Hardys," gushed Kathy.

All of the chosen WWE wrestlers are retired or nearly retired.

Tonight's main event will feature "The Real Deal" Ryan Davis taking on Triple H (circa 2001).

Draft Coming To The Slammables

Draft Coming To The Slammables

The Powers-That-Be that operate The Slammables have announced plans for a draft.

This draft won't split The Slammables into two, like the WWE Draft did. Instead, Slammables may be drafted to one of four teams.

The four teams will be led by managers. These managers will make the selections for their respective teams. These teams will then enter into a league-like, multi-week competition.

"We think this is a swell idea. Actually, we don't know what it is. We were all pretty tired when we made the decision. Truthfully, most of us have no idea what we even agreed to," said The Slammables Powers-That-Be.

Not every The Slammables will be drafted. The exact make up of the teams will be announced later. The Powers-That-Be did say the teams will consist of at least four wrestlers.

"She-oot! I hope I'm done drafted. I haven't been on a team since my calf ropin' days," said Maverick.

"Draft? Sounds more like a conspiracy. Count me out," explains "The Real Deal" Ryan Davis.

"As long as there are no dwarves, orcs, or hobbits on my team I'll be okay," notes Azrael Draven.

Expect more details about The Slammables Draft, including when the draft will happen, in the near future.